ALLI 2018 Throwback

Photo by: Amy Piñon

By Amr Awwad

Summer of 2018, I had just wrapped up an awesome month-long program with The Residency as I got into ALLI, the Arts, Leadership, and Liberation Institute. It’s a two-week intensive summer program put on by Arts Corps, Youth Speaks, Massive Monkees, and Totem Star where 28 youth are trained in artistry, social justice and organizing. Youth leaders develop as cultural workers in four arts pathways: spoken word poetry, music production, visual art and breakdance. This cohort of youth hones their arts and organizing skills, while deepening their understandings of race and social justice issues. They collaborate, build community and create art that challenges oppression and envisions a more just world. Personally, I chose the music pathway, as I wanted to learn more about how to be a DJ. But anyways, that article isn’t about me. I’m here to talk about the program, and boy, was it dope.

Photo by: Amy Piñon

At the beginning of each day, we’d have everyone in one room to partake in different activities, meshing social justice and art in our work. For example, on one day, we were split into different groups and had to work with a quote that was given to us by the teaching artists. My group’s quote was about Revolution, and we had to create a performance piece that included all 4 pathways and perform it in front of the other groups. Overall, the activities were really good at giving youth the inspiration and creative path to fuse art, in its various forms, with elements of social justice.

Photo By: Amy Piñon

In each pathway, youth would practice on refining their craft but also delve into unknown territory in terms of new skills to learn. For me, before ALLI, I had ZERO knowledge on how to DJ and what it takes to mix music. By the end of the two weeks, I was able to DJ a 30 minute set in front of over 100 people. I also grew a passion for DJing and now get to DJ at other events.

Photo By: Amy Piñon

The day of the ALLI showcase, we had many people from the community come to see what we’ve been working on. They got to see a gallery of paintings made by the visual art pathway, and also attend an open mic that was hosted by two of our poetry pathway students, Bitanya and Suraya. For the show itself, which was hosted by Kid LIO, every ALLI participant got to shine on the stage and share their unique experience through their art.

5 Ways To Improve Your Self Confidence As A Musician

Jawzilla in the element

Written by Mirabai Jyothi Kukathas

They say write what you know, but here I am doing quite the opposite. One of the biggest reasons I don’t write music or perform that often is that I lack the self confidence. When I sit down to write I hear a voice telling me not to bother. Every performance I’ve been a part of has been preceded by intense stage fright. So why am I, a person with very little self esteem, especially in regards to music, giving you tips on becoming more confident? Well, because my boss told me to. No, I’m just kidding; it’s because I’ve been working to become more confident and know first hand what’s helpful and what's complete nonsense. Now, you might be thinking, but Mirabai, unlike you, I am not a nervous wreck, to which I say, good for you but everyone gets nervous, especially preforming artists. I think it's really important to keep the following things in mind, so without further ado… HOW NOT TO BE A NERVOUS WRECK, written by a nervous wreck because primary sources are important.

1. Be kind to yourself. Usually people save the most important piece of advice until the end of the list, but I’m going to put it first on the off chance you get bored and stop reading to go watch a cat video or make some toast or something. Recently, I was asked how I'd  want a friend to react if I was experiencing anxiety before a performance, or even just in every day life. I said that I'd appreciate kindness and honesty. I realized a lot of people would say the same, but I was not treating myself with those qualities and often neither do others. . It’s easy to treat your loved ones with kindness or to crave kindness from them, but most people are far less willing to be easily excited, forgiving, or appreciative when it comes to themselves. So, be kind to yourself because you are pretty damn awesome.

2. Practice. This one’s pretty short, sweet, and obvious but it works: if you practice something you feel self conscious about, you will improve. If you improve, you will become less self conscious abut it. This is especially true in regards to music. You’ve probably noticed that you feel more at ease performing a song  you’ve practiced a million times or that writing a song is a less daunting task if you’ve done it before. Practice makes perfect.

3. Learn that it’s okay to be only or less than okay. Okay, I lied: Practice doesn't make perfect. There is no such thing as perfect, yet most humans expect themselves to somehow achieve this delusional aspect. A lot of self consciousness derives from the idea that you should be flawless at whatever you’re doing. We have these crazy expectations of ourselves, and when they aren’t met we get upset. I recently wrote a song which for some reason I decided had to be fantastic. When I felt that it wasn’t, I got really down on myself. The song was, in all honesty, pretty bad, but looking back on it with kindness (see no.1) I’ve decided that’s perfectly okay.

4. Surround yourself with supportive people. I understand that this isn’t always an option, but when it is, it’s insanely helpful. I assume that at at least one point in your life you have been around people who have put you down; who have made you feel less than. It really sucks. That’s why having a community of people who lift you up and vocalize the best parts of you is really amazing. It makes you want to make music and share it with your community. For me, Totem Star is that community. That's why the power of collaboration is so strong. You and your collaborators can teach each other and build yourselves up. I know it can sometimes feel like other people are able to create musical magic out of thin air, but they aren't and you'll see that through working together. So go write something with your friends. 

5. Celebrate the little victories. You wrote a song? It wasn’t very good? I have no idea what that must feel like, but congratulations! You wrote a song, that’s impressive, I’m proud of you, and you should be proud of yourself! You can always push yourself to make it better or you can write a new song that resonates with you more or perform something that showcases your talents and views more coherently, but always be proud of what you’ve accomplished. Big victories always begin with the little ones.

Here are a couple links if you want to read more on the subject. 

How Much Does Confidence Affect Musical Ability? by Anthony Cerullo from Sonicbids

Becoming a Confident Performer by Gerald Klickstein from Musicians Way

ALLI 2017

L to R: LIO, Mirabai Kukathas, Zora Seboulisa, Monica Elenes, and Daniel Pak. Photo Credit: Amy Piñon

Written by Mirabai Jyothi Kukathas

The first week of July 2017 was one of the best weeks of my life. Totem Star, Youth Speaks, and our awesome mutual sponsor Arts Corps put on the Arts Leadership Liberation Institute (ALLI) for the second year running. ALLI is a weeklong art intensive for poets, musicians, and visual artists. We spent the week building community, partaking in social justice-related workshops, and creating pieces of art to share at the end of the week.

When I applied to ALLI, I didn’t think I would actually get in. I knew some of the people involved and didn’t think I was accomplished enough to spend a week with such talented artists. When I did get in, I was both excited and incredibly nervous. However, my nerves melted away almost as soon as I walked into Youngstown Cultural Arts Center, where ALLI was held. One thing that cannot be said enough about the Youthspeaks/Totem Star family is how kind and welcoming it is.

We spent the majority of the first day getting to know one another. We began with everyone putting an object of emotional value in the center of the circle we sat in, summing up the object’s significance in one or two words. We went back around the circle and everyone took an object that symbolized something they needed more of in their lives. I put in a statue of the goddess Saraswati, symbolizing ancestry and inspiration, and took a picture which represented resiliance. At the end we gave the items back to their owners, thanking them for the characteristics they embodied. It was so nice to fill up the room with love and strength, and doing so really set the tone for the supportive environment of ALLI.    

LIO wows the crowd with her poetry. Photo credit: Amy Piñon. 

For the rest of the week we’d spend the mornings together, still getting to know each other, learning about outreach and organization, and even taking a workshop led by Anakbayan. In the afternoon we would divide into our three pathways (spoken-word poetry, music, and visual art) and get working on our pieces. I loved catching glimpses of half-finished paintings and hearing snippets of poems when I popped out into the hall. The whole place seemed alive with art and excitement.

During the course of the week, my friend Zora and I wrote a song. It started off as just a baseline and a short poem of hers, but together we expanded the lyrics and wrote a melody. For the most part she did the lyrics and I did the melody, but worked together for the entire process, bouncing ideas off each other and getting excited after our eureka moments. At the end of the week we had created something I was really proud of, something I never thought I’d be able to to do. For me, that was the best part about ALLI: doing something I never thought I could. Proving myself wrong. Gaining some confidence.

The song-writing process. L to R: Zora and Mirabai. Photo credit: Amy Piñon.

At the end of the week we put on a block party, open mic, and showcase. A bunch of people from the community showed up (some even brought food!), got to know each other, performed at the open mic, and partook in the general awesomeness. The showcase itself was electric; I could not believe everyone created what they did in just five days. It’d been a long time since I’d performed in front of people, but when I was singing up there everything felt right. I owe a lot to ALLI for getting me into the Youth Speaks/Totem Star community, building my confidence and skills, and for a truly amazing week I will never forget.

To see more ALLI stories, click here.

To see all performances from the ALLI showcase, click here